Momentarily...

Many times, out of the blue when things just start sailing smooth, comes a day when you feel life is really bitchy. But now after 29 years of walking on this earth, treading at the so called green grass, I realize life is all about how you want it to be. It is meant to be alive. Celebrating every moment and enjoying all what happens. I know this is not something so new.
I get despaired when I don’t get what I want. I haven’t thought really what is that I look out for? To seek happiness in the times of gloom is what life is. Enjoying the beautiful sunsets and smelling the earth when it absorbs the first drop of rain, to see children happy and smiling, running with their heavy bags behind their bags to school, to see youngsters standing in a queue in front on the bus stand waiting for the green DTC to have at least some space where they can stand and board, to smile back at your own life, giggle at the pranks you’ve played, makes this mundane life very pleasant to me. Today, out of my desire to hold something back, I am left empty handed. I have nobody to me, just two pairs of innocent glistening eyes that question me what wrong did they do? Suddenly the realization comes that every thing is constant, despite the fact that nothing remains as you want, nothing remains when you want. Cause you don’t lose anything here, it’s the same earth that you’ve been born again and again, it’s the same people who are to remain whether close or far away…But what remains within is yourself…
This is also a momentary phase, which like other challenging times would pass by. And then I would look back and smile to myself! While writing this, I am missing my kids badly. I miss every moment with them. Right from the time they were born and to the time when they said their first words. The little things that they say have made me roll out laughing! I wish every thing changes for good. There would be a day when I would be with them and with my love. My hope is still alive!!