Today i feel happy... happy to overcome all the fears I had. The fear to lose somebody very close..I finally chose to lose him. Detachment to all things as I had mentioned in my previous posts, things that I thought were "mine", has taken its toll. Each day i am losing on my so valued possessions. But for the first time, I lost on faith. It aint such a big issue that i need to write, it is that I have nobody to speak to. People call me a fool. I agree and accept! Today, with immense pride I hate to admit that being cheated upon has been the most shattering battle of life. I hate to look upon myself. I stand alone... the way I was when I was 14... with nobody beside me.... my two sisters as my responsibility, and the disgust to live. Today is the same, two kids to live for.
I fail to understand why do people fib? Is it because they are scared of the consequences, they ae born liars or they just want to get the best out of you and make their way. The first time I was bruised mentally was way back. I had made a secret vow that nobody dare touch my soul ever. But destiny had to take its toll. Why do I write all this crap? To find some amount of peace or to console my grief....???
Have I stopped reacting?
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